Why does one child run away from home, while another one doesn’t? This is not a simple question and there are no simple answers.
The reasons why kids run away from home are as diverse as the kids themselves. A child might feel unwanted because of divorce, the arrival of a new baby, or parents who focus too much on other priorities. She may feel unsafe due to repeated mental or physical abuse, or feel diminished because of verbal abuse, neglect, or competition with siblings. There could be the threat of drugs or alcohol in the home, peer pressure, or problems at school. Things such as pregnancy and sexuality will often lead a child to leave home because he/she fears the parents’ reaction. In the most recently updated trend report from Crisis Connections, the greatest increase in issues attributed to kids in crisis was economics.
Our culture has sometimes glorified living on the streets, encouraging vulnerable kids to see running away as an adventure – an opportunity to be free of all responsibility. But in most cases, children who decide to leave home do so because they are running away from something, not to something. The very act of running away is a huge cry for help, a declaration that they have lost control over their lives and are striving to get it back. These children are looking for independence and a sense of power and control. Think about it. When you lack the ability to affect change in your life or to cope with the problems around you, the act of running away might offer a simple solution – just leave those problems behind. Once you’re on the streets, you’ll be making decisions for yourself and living by your own set of rules, not someone else’s.
What these children don’t know is that the problems they will face on the streets are often far greater than the ones they face at home. Basic things like food and safe shelter become priorities but difficult to find. The moment a child lands on the street, he becomes prey to anyone who would take advantage of him. And now the safety net, if he had one, is gone.
Approximately 1.6 to 1.7 million children in the United States are determined to be homeless each year. Girls are more likely to run away than boys and the largest group of runaways is usually between 15 and 17 years old.
There are different kinds of runaway kids. Situational runaways leave home because of a specific incident but return within a day or two. Chronic runaways leave home over and over again, staying away for longer and longer periods of times. Sometimes, these children never return. And, lastly, there are the “throwaways” –the kids whose families have kicked them out or abandoned them all together.
Life on the streets is dangerous and a constant struggle to survive. The risk is great and it is real. These kids face the strong possibility of malnutrition, disease, rape, physical abuse, theft, alcohol and drug abuse, unwanted pregnancies, sexually transmitted diseases, depression and more. What will they do to survive? Almost anything – including stealing, panhandling, dealing in drugs and prostitution, or posing for pornographic pictures.
Over the next couple of months, we hope to delve more deeply into the world of the runaway youth right here in Renton – right outside our door. We will also explore the resources available to help not only the kids who run away, but their parents as well. Please join us on this enlightening journey.
Lynn Bohart is the executive director of the Renton Community Foundation that oversees a number of funds that provide financial or other kinds of support to those in need in Renton. She can be reached at lbohart@rentonfoundation.org.
